Wednesday, December 29, 2010

From Cloud 9 to the Daily Grind




Is it 2011 yet? No? Well, damn.

Obviously Christmas came and went for us. The boyfriend was kind to my impatience and we exchanged our gifts Christmas Eve night. He swears he loves everything I got for him...and I'm mostly inclined to believe him :) He spoiled me (as he usually does) and so I was floating on cloud nine for most of the weekend.

Unfortunately Monday morning came and off to work for the both of us. And for some silly reason, it feels like I haven't stopped running since then. Finally tonight I'm able to sit down with my second love (the computer and its interwebs) and attempt to get some other work done. All though, writing has never really felt like "work" to me. I guess that's just how it is when you're doing something you're truly passionate about.

So now that you're all up to speed on the chaos that is my life, let's see what else I can tell you...

The band plays Friday night for a huge New Year's Eve bash. I shall be there, front and center....hopefully with a great friend or two. I will also probably be partaking of the drink specials. I've only recently come to realize that this year is one of the first New Year's that I've had "adult" plans and so I plan to do it up right...however that may be. (I may need a few pointers...)

Saturday marks the beginning of a new year, a new decade and, for some, a new era. I don't know if any of my readers make resolutions but I do. I haven't always, in fact, there was a period in my life that I was sure resolutions were the dreams of fools. I don't really remember when or why I changed my mind but change I did and I'm proud to say that this last year I was successful in keeping not one, but TWO resolutions. But more about that later...

Since the boyfriend and I both have Saturday and Sunday completely and totally OFF from everything...we have plans to do nothing. And it will rock. I have plenty of little projects around the house that I would like to spend some time on. I think I might even make a stew and bake some fresh bread or something equally cozy. And yes, all of that DOES constitute as doing nothing.

And with all of that goodness awaiting me I suppose I should call it a night. Seeing as how I have to work for the next two days before I get any of that goodness. Damn daily grind and needing the monies for bills and stuffs. {GRUMBLE, GRUMBLE, GRUMBLE}

Until next time, Toodles my dears!!

Friday, December 24, 2010

"Ohh, there must be some easier way for me to get my wings."




Merry Christmas!!

Or Merry Christmas Eve!! (If you wanna get technical all about it...)

No daily grind for me until Monday, the boyfriend has a short day and then is also off until Monday, all of the presents are wrapped and the stockings are ready to go and we're stocked up with apple cider and hot cocoa. Christmas dinner is thawing in the fridge and almost all of the baking is done. Oh yeah folks, it's gonna be a damn good weekend :)

In spite of it all, I am actually feeling a bit of the holiday spirit. I've got breakfast planned in the morning (french toast, sausage, eggs and fruit) and dinner planned for late tomorrow afternoon (rosemary pork roast, potatoes, fresh rolls, baked pasta and veggies) and plenty of games and Christmas movies. I'm a little nervous though...I just hope everyone likes their gifts. The boyfriend assures me he will...but he might just be saying that because he loves me.

I struggled with what your holiday list should be. It was the only thing holiday related that I couldn't absolutely decide on one way or the other. I had many ideas, and I had many ideas offered up from friends but none of them lasted very long in the chaos that is my mind. And so, more nostalgia it is...


My Top 9 Favorite Christmas Memories and/or Traditions

Watching It's a Wonderful Life every year.



This is my mother's favorite holiday movie. Every single year for as far back as I can remember, Mom has required that we all sit down and watch the movie together as a family, either on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. As kids we'd all grumble and whine and, truth be told, even a few times as adults there was some whining involved. But since Mom's golden rule is no fighting on Christmas, watch the movie we did. Secretly, I've always loved the movie and if I could pick one thing I'll miss this year, it's watching it with Mom.

The year I discovered the TRUTH about Santa.



I was SIX. Sad, I know. Short story is that I found a bike in it's hiding spot (By complete accident, I swear!!) a few weeks before Christmas. I didn't think much about it at the time, but come Christmas morning and there's the same bike with a gift tag that reads "From Santa" and my little six-year-old eyes got all kinds of opened. To my credit, I managed to keep the story alive for my little sisters. I don't even think I told my parents about that story until just a few years ago. See y'all, I CAN keep a secret after all!!

Baby oranges and coconut for breakfast.



I'm not sure how exactly this little tradition got started, I only know that it came from J's side of the family. Every year for Christmas breakfast (and usually other big holidays too...) we would have mandarin oranges sprinkled with coconut for breakfast. I know it sounds kind of funny but it's part of my youth. And a testament to it's staying power as a tradition? My mother continued it even after her divorce from J. I have now served it to my own lil man...and just this Thanksgiving I shared it with the boyfriend. And before you ask, yes, we'll be having it tomorrow morning. It's one of those things that I think will never change.

Please Mom!! Can we open just one present early?



Anyone who knows me knows how very impatient I am. I blame my family. Every year the week before Christmas is spent with my sisters and I bargaining with Mom. Her resolve never lasts long because it never fails, every night for about a week before Christmas we beg and she finally gives in letting everyone open JUST ONE present early. (It was always JUST ONE but you knew you were going to get to open another the next night so it never really mattered.) I've often wondered how we even have anything left under the tree by the time the big morning comes. When we were really little Mom would let us open a gift on Christmas Eve that always held our new jammies, robe and/or slippers. Then we would have nice new comfies to wear the next morning while unwrapping gifts and eating our baby oranges. I tried sharing this little tradition with the boyfriend but he's stayed steadfast and won't even let me have a peek :( He says if I'm good, we can open gifts tonight. I don't think he fully realizes that he's depriving me of a family tradition.

"All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth."



Good lord, I can't tell you how many times I've heard this song. As a wee one, I'm sure it was played every year, multiple times. When my sisters were very smallish (4 and 6 or so) they played it over and over again so that they could both sing along until they were hoarse. It was our version of America's Got Talent. Sometimes I think it's not officially Christmas until I hear this song...which reminds me, I should probably take a little listen :)

NURTS!!



I'm sure this game has many other names...but my family adopted NURTS since we don't swear. (That is, we don't swear around certain family members...) It's like a group version of solitaire. You can have as little as two or three people but the more the merrier (and crazier). When my step-dad's family comes for the holidays we've had as many as ten of us crowded around the table. A word to the wise? More than five or six people and chaos will ensue. My calm, passive pastor of an uncle actually knocked a chair to the ground one year. It was beautiful! What better way to burn off some of that tension from playing nice all week?

How the Grinch Stole Christmas



It is not, I repeat...IT IS NOT Christmas until I have seen this classic. Fortunately for the boyfriend (or maybe unfortunately since I made him watch with me...) both the original and the Jim Carrey versions were on last night so I got my fix. And now you can all listen to me croak out "You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch" over and over again. (Before you ask, no, I have NOT gotten back full capacity of my voice. Damnit!) Maybe one of these years I'll even do my hair like one of the Whos from Whoville...

Sinterklaas



I believe I've mentioned before that I was a military brat growing up. And so, as a result of a stint overseas in Europe, my family picked up this wonderful tradition. Every December 5th we set out a shoe and fell asleep with dreams of sugar plums and whatnot. On the morning of December 6th we would race out to see what Saint Nicholas had left us. Candy if we had been good, a switch if we had not. As was the case most years, a switch with candy if we had been both good and bad. It's a bit impractical for me to continue this as an adult. (I now know how gross feet are and will not permit ANY form of edibles being placed in mine or the boyfriend's shoes.) However, I still shared some of my favorite European food with the boyfriend on December 6th to mark this little memory this year.

Crazy Relatives




No holiday is complete without the obligatory relative that refuses (for whatever reason) to conform to what is acceptable. Whether it's your aunt who likes to pinch every one's cheeks (big or small) or the distant relative giving a sermon on the evils of youth today each time they catch you on your cell phone; EVERY family has someone. In my hugely extended family...we have many. Which is why you can usually catch Mom secretly spiking her cranberry juice in between rounds of cards. And why the kids are playing Rock, Paper, Scissors to see who has the pleasure to sit next to Aunt Pinchy at the dinner table. Or why absolutely ANY excuse to run to the store for some last minute forgotten item is pounced on by nearly every person in a two foot radius. Back when I smoked (secretly) I ran to the store for that forgotten but completely vital item nearly every twenty minutes just to sneak in a quick cigarette for my sanity. But Christmas just wouldn't be the same otherwise.

No matter what your holiday traditions are or what your plans for this weekend may be I hope that you are all safe in your celebrations. And maybe today's list will inspire you to take a look at what traditions you'd like to pass on. Sharing our memories and teaching new friends and loved ones about our past is the way traditions move on and stay alive. And it's through this that we remember where we came from. So to those I love most, bust out the Martinelli's and Scrabble, it's Christmas!!

Merry Christmas readers! And until next time, Toodles!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Thanks for the memories Bubba and Columbo.




I'm sitting here staring at my computer screen and all it's blankness wondering what, if anything, of substance I have to write about. Apparently sinus troubles = writer's block. Who knew?

With Miranda Lambert's hit "The House That Built Me" swimming around in my clogged mind, I'm tempted to write some poignant stories about my childhood. It must be all that holiday nostalgia creeping in on me. Well...it's as good an idea as any.

One of my absolute favorite people when I was younger was my maternal grandmother. Grandma W and I shared a special bond that I'm not sure I understand even now. I believe I've mentioned before that my mother had me at a fairly young age (16) and so, understandably, her mother was probably less than thrilled. I've been told by my uncles and occasionally by my mother that Grandma was adamant about not liking this baby that was about to disrupt her household. That is, until I was born.

To hear one of my uncles tell it, my grandmother's previously frozen heart just melted at the sight of her newborn (and first) grandchild. Since I was clearly not in any position to take notice, I'll have to trust him on this one.

I don't have any memories of my very early childhood but I do have stories that my mother, uncles and even my grandmother have told me for years. One involves one or both of my uncles strapping my car seat to a skateboard and watching me roll down the large hill upon which our house was sitting with my mother chasing after me. Another involves me dressed in a little baby t-shirt and sweat bands, riding on my uncle's shoulders while he danced around to Olivia Newton-John's "Let's Get Physical". Clearly my uncles had fun whilst babysitting. Sometimes I wonder how I made it to see double digits.

I have two very special treasures from this time in my life, both from my grandmother. One is a red quilt that was made by the sisters at her church and given to me when my mom brought me home from the hospital. The other is my teddy. He's battered and torn now, his once shiny yellow satin ribbon is now a dingy scrap of cloth still clinging to his neck and his music box has been run through the washing machine one time too many, he now croaks and whines instead of singing the sweet melody of my favorite lullaby. As sad as he may look or sound, that bear will be a part of my life until the end of days.

My grandmother was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes when my mother was still a young girl. I don't know why she was never able to get her lifestyle or health under control, but by the time my family had moved back to Oregon, Grandma had already had surgery to remove part of one of her legs and was confined to a wheelchair.

My mother and grandmother had a very tumultuous relationship, much like my own with my mother. (Any one noticing a pattern here?) Because of the nature of their relationship, it was often that I would visit my grandmother alone. Which was fine with me. My weekends with Grandma are some of my most favorite memories. She taught me how to bake, how to do jigsaw puzzles and fostered my love of the Portland Trailblazers. Together we watched Columbo and In the Heat of the Night. (Grandma had a crush on Bubba.) We would watch game shows and play along, challenging each other.

My grandma taught me that you didn't need to have money to have fun. Her monthly disability payments didn't allow for much 'play' money but what little she did have, she always used to spoil her favorite grand baby. My mother had other daughters and Grandma didn't love them any less...but as she once told me, there's something special about being the first.

Grandma passed away due to complications from her diabetes when I was just a sophomore in high school. Of all the people who've come and gone in my life, I miss her most. To use her words, it's not that I love the others any less...it's just something special about the first. Grandma was my first family member that was more than just family. We had a friendship, a bond that extended past the fact that we shared blood. Her loss cut me deeply and to this day I think of her with tears in my eyes.

The lessons I learned on those weekends at Grandma's will stay with me forever. And hopefully, when I'm older (MUCH older) and I have grandchildren I can show them how to bake pink cupcakes and how to put a jigsaw puzzle together. We can watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune and I can smile through the tears knowing Grandma's legacy is living on.

I'm sorry folks, I really had hopes that today would be a little more light-hearted. I guess my fingers and my brain had a different idea. I'm off to continue with preparations for the holiday. Anybody want to help me finish this blanket?

Until next time, Toodles! And don't forget to tell your loved ones how dear they are to you.

Monday, December 20, 2010

This one goes out to Mr. Brightside



I really need to stop taking these little unscheduled hiatuses- especially if I mean to make 100 posts by my first birthday. If the boyfriend and I could just FINALLY kick these colds that keep lingering around then maybe I wouldn't have spent the majority of the last four days in bed. Since this round of the cold from hell involved me not having a voice much over a whisper, there weren't many arguments with the T.V. I know, I know, you're all so very disappointed, aren't you?

Instead I had plenty of time to think. (When my brain wasn't trying to squeeze its way out through my ears...) Did I learn my lesson and take notes this time? Nope, most definitely not. I'm stubborn that way. Which you should all probably know by now.

In some weird form of restitution for my absence, I've taken advantage of the fact that I have so many friends lately with relationship struggles and comprised the following segment. Enjoy!


Tips for 'Tards: The Relationship Edition

First and foremost, you must stop wishing that a) your last relationship had never happened, b) your last relationship had never ended or c) your ex would die in some horribly fantastic way. I don't say this to burst your bubble (okay, maybe I do get some sick pleasure from bubble bursting...but still...) but because it is vital to your ability to move forward in the relationship world.

Second, embrace being single. I know it sucks to be alone, especially when you're not used to it. However, not wanting to be alone anymore is not a good start for any new relationship. You need to find yourself again and be happy with who you are as a person before you try sharing that person with someone else. Otherwise you're setting yourself (and your partner) up to fail.

Third, it is not always a bad idea to make a list of qualities you appreciate. Writing information down has a way of solidifying it in our conscious minds. I'm not saying to make a "shopping list" for the perfect mate...because, as we all know, no one is perfect. But it is a good idea to know what qualities you can't live without...and what qualities you can't live with. For example, if you're a clean, neat person...you probably shouldn't date someone who is a slob. Just a tip.

Fourth, and I can't stress this enough: COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION. And for all the "special" folk out there- Communication is not simply one person talking and the other listening, swap and repeat. You need to learn to express yourself, to talk about how you're feeling and what you're needing/wanting or you will never be able to have a truly successful relationship. Even if you can't talk about something right at that particular moment, just saying something like, "I can't talk about this right now, but we're okay," can go a long way to preventing hurt feelings or even an argument. Also, as you may have guessed, this one is important for both parties. So if you're dating a non-talker...might want to do some evaluation.

Fifth and final, nine times out of ten, your friends will be right. If you have one friend telling you it's a bad idea you can probably take it with a grain of salt. If you have five friends telling you that your new crush isn't a good fit, maybe you should start paying attention. And if you have ten or more friends telling you that your new Mr./Ms. Right is all sorts of crazy chaos, buddy, grab your things and run for the hills. That many people who know you closely can't all be dead wrong.

I know a mere five tips can't possibly encompass everything I've learned about relationships. However, there is laundry and baking that needs to be done before this weekend. Just a few more days left until Christmas, y'all!

I hope you had a great weekend and you're all happily in the holiday spirit. Much thanks and love to my friends who let me pick their brains for information for today's blog. And double that to my friends whose relationship struggles inspired today's list. Don't fret, it's bound to get better loves!

Until next time, Toodles!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

"...The more I see, the less I know, the more I'd like to let it go..."



Oh, hello again. Miss me much?

I kind of sort of played hooky on Monday, I hope none of you mind. I needed it though.

Friday's post included a shout out for prayers for my family. Unfortunately, our hurt little girl didn't make it through her surgery and passed away shortly after the blog was posted. Although I didn't know her personally, (I have a HUGE extended family...) I am still overcome with sadness. My heart aches for her family, for her parents. It is unnatural for a parent to have to bury a child. And yet, it seems more and more I hear stories of children whose lives were cut short.

Why?

Oh, I'm sure I could go off on some rant right now about the dangerous world we live in but, honestly? I just don't have it in me. Instead, I'm floundering, searching vainly for answers, for something to take away the pain I feel for people I love who are hurting beyond belief.

Before you suggest it, I tried alcohol. I drank both Friday and Saturday nights while out with the band. It didn't help. I've had alone time, boyfriend time, time with the girls, hell, even time at the daily grind. Nothing works for long. It's like I only get a brief reprieve. For a short moment I forget all that's wrong and I laugh a little, maybe crack a smile. And then the silence creeps in and my heart cries loudly reminding me of all of the hurt.

My family is overwhelmed with guilt and grief. How do you show someone the life lessons you've already had to learn the hard way? Is there anyway? Or must we simply stand by and hold the hands of our loved ones while they cross these bridges?

For once, I'm afraid I don't have any answers, just questions. If any of my faithful readers have some answers for me, I'm all ears...or eyes as the case may be.

I'm sorry I don't have something more uplifting for you today...maybe next time.

Toodles.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Paradise, save me!



I still want to run away.


But I've resigned myself to the fact that it's just not feasible at this time and place. So I'm trying very hard to behave, stop whining and get some work done. I figure if I work really hard and make the holidays wonderful and great for everyone involved maybe, just maybe the boyfriend and I can sneak away after New Years.

A girl can hope, can't she?

However, in the spirit of disappearing to some fantastic place, here's your list for the weekend.


Top 9 Cities I Want to Visit
(In no order of any sort because I'm just feeling that ambiguous today. Bite me.)


Rome, Italy



I really want to go to Vatican City as well. But, as I was informed this morning, Vatican City is its own country so technically it is not a city. Rome is just as lovely though, and stuffed to the gills with wonderful history, art and culture. Give me a plate of authentic pasta, wine and a breathtaking fountain to stare at and I will be a blissful girl.

Dublin, Ireland



My whiteness hails from this wonderful country. I'd like to go and see how my drinking skills match up to the locals :) I'm fairly certain they could drink me under the table in no time flat. But it would be fun!

Paris, France



One of the things on my Bucket List is to climb to the top of the Eiffel Tower. Add in the Louvre and all of that yummy pastry...Yes, please!

New York City, U.S.A.



I want to see the Statue of Liberty (also on the list...), to walk through Times Square, to stand in the middle of all of that chaos and relish the fact that I'm mostly sane. I want to pay my respects at Ground Zero and stroll through Central Park.

Munich, Germany



One word says it all. Oktoberfest.

Edinburgh, Scotland



One of my favorite authors has a series of books that are primarily set in Scotland. Ever since I started reading her writing I've wanted to visit Scotland and see the sites she describes in such vivid detail. The castle in Edinburgh is just calling my name. Can you hear it?

Sydney, Australia



Ah, the Opera House. Such a worldwide symbol of great music. Is there really any question why I would want to visit there? Also...I want to see a kangaroo.

Geneva, Switzerland



Chocolate. Watches (For the boyfriend, he has a watch fetish. I could care less about watches, bring on the earrings.). Pretty freakin' gorgeous mountains. Plus, they have a set of international laws named after their city. Kinda ups the level of coolness.

Athens, Greece



I am a great lover of Greek mythology. Clearly, since I was Medusa for Halloween this year. I would cherish visiting the site of such amazing amounts of history. I want to see the sights that Homer saw.


Ah, to get away to any one of these paradises would be the peanut butter to my jelly right now. And now I'm off to get to work on all of those little things that need to get done. I hope you all have a great weekend. Party safe, y'all!

Toodles!


**P.S.

On a serious note, I have an extended family member who is in trouble. She was in a car accident recently and she's just taken a turn for the worse. I'm asking for any good thoughts, karma or prayers you can send her way. Thank you all in advance.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Imagine...me far, far, far away.



I want to run away.


Better yet, I want to kidnap the boyfriend, pack a gigantic picnic and run away to somewhere with a nice scenic view and minimal to no interference from the outside world.

I know, I know, I'm whining again...

It's just...well, the world has a sneaky ability to make day-to-day life so damn troubling. There is so much on my plate that it's now over-flowing, dripping onto the floor...causing yet another mess I need to clean up.

In a perfect world, the boyfriend wouldn't have to work the rest of the week. There would be no gigs or practice. I wouldn't have to while away at the daily grind. We could pack up the car with the necessities, turn our phones off and drive off into the cold and stormy weather. We would find a nice, cozy hotel in some quiet, peaceful little town and hide away.

Sounds ideal, doesn't it?

I know it's not all bad. The biggest amount of Christmas shopping is done. Lil Man's birthday presents are set and ready for him to open them next week. It may be storming, but at least it's rain and not a blizzard. And most of all, life may be stressing me out...but at least I have wonderful friends with which to de-stress.

But, oh...to disappear to a secluded island somewhere. No drama, no stress, no responsibilities...Yes, please!

And in honor of today, I'll leave you with these wonderful words of wisdom:

"You may say that I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us and the world will live as one."

R.I.P. John Lennon

Toodles, my dears.

Monday, December 6, 2010

A Drool Worthy Monday




It is Monday morning, yet again. Anyone wanna start a petition to remove Monday's from the calendar? I promise I'll sign.

My weekend had its ups and downs but overall was pretty great. Friday night was spent with the band. A former band mate of the boyfriend's and his wife (The former band mate's, NOT the boyfriend's...I'm not THAT backwoods, folks.) came out to boogie and so I got to visit with them. I always like to meet people that have known the boyfriend for longer than I have. It's another one of those little windows to his past.

Saturday was awesome. The Oregon Ducks beat their rivals the Oregon State Beavers in the annual Civil War game and are now on their way to the National BCS Championship game next month. Tickets are going for some where around $700. Needless to say, we won't be going.

Saturday night was back out with the band and Miss J. I absolutely love spending time with my girls, they can always, ALWAYS bring a smile to my face.

Sunday was supposed to be me at home being all sorts of domestic and whatnot whilst the boyfriend hung out with his best buddy. Instead, Miss J kidnapped me (Thank God!!) and I helped her out at her annual Holiday Gift Bazaar at her salon. This was a good and bad idea. As most of you know, I am broke as a joke after spoiling lil man for Christmas and his birthday. So yesterday was spent with me drooling and dreaming up fantastic Wish Lists. The good part was that I got to meet some really cool ladies AND I got to spend some fun-while-not-trying-to-scream-to-be-heard-over-the-band time with Miss J. Indeed, it was a good day.

I do have a fabulous idea though...

Just because I can't do anymore Christmas shopping without pawning off body parts doesn't mean that my friends, readers and/or fellow bloggers can't cross some people off of their shopping lists via the wonderful interwebs.

So here you have it folks, a list on Monday! My favorite ladies from yesterday's bazaar, a lovely sample of what I was drooling over and all of the contact info so you guys can shop away!

Naomi @ Nannah Designs




Michelle @ Arbonne International




Susan @ Willow House




Leah @ Miche Bags




Marcy @ Tomboy Tools


**Marcy can be reached directly at: dansgirl75@clear.net


Kathryn @ Pampered Chef




Sara @ Scentsy





I'll leave you all to your shopping now. I hope you guys had a safe and great weekend. And if you happen to be in my neck of the woods, give me a jingle. I know where to send you for a great hair-stylist ;)

Toodles!

Friday, December 3, 2010

The Birth of Elephino...or Roadtip Part Deux!




Happiness, it is once again the weekend. And alas, this weekend is setting up to be spectacular! Let's see...the band plays tonight and tomorrow night, Civil War is tomorrow and...AND...I get to see Nubs!!! How fantastic is this news? Pretty much it's GREAT since I only get to see him once in a blue moon now that he's up and moved his booty away.

In honor of our friendship and laughs, I shall continue the best story either of us will ever tell you. Now where was I?

Oh yes...

So we were traveling. We made it safely to his coastal town without incident. After concluding said business, we fueled up, grabbed some lunch and some snacks for later and hit the road again, freshly armed with his CD collection. Funny little tid-bit: That man has more scratched CD's than a pawn shop. Still, it was better than nothing and we sang along to Korn and Tim McGraw with equal gusto. Yup, we're cool like that.

As we started across the mountain pass and headed south, we began to notice small amounts of snow on the side of the highway. I distinctly remember laughing and smiling about our good fortune of being inside a heated car and not out in the increasing cold. Oh how I would rue those words.

We made it to my hometown with little incident and ran my few errands, even stopping off to visit one of my other awesome friends...who's girlfriend asked if Nubs was my new boyfriend. Clearly in this day and age it's rare for men and woman in our peer group to simply be friends with absolutely no romantic entanglements.

Well yay for us being pioneers!

Back on the road, finally heading north as the darkness closed in around us. At this point, we're quickly approaching 12 hours of being in the car. Fun times, indeed. Oh, oh, oh...a slight side note. If you're ever traveling on Highway 97 in Oregon you will pass a large THING on the side of the road. It's unclear what this item is...I believe at one point in time it was a statue of either an elephant or rhinoceros or something. However, as we were heading south, we had passed it without much comment. On the return trip north, we passed again and Nubs says to me,

"What is that thing?"

Me: "I don't know. I think it was supposed to be an elephant or rhino at some point. Not really sure."

Nubs: "An elephino?"

(Now this is what I think he says. I should remind you that I am partially deaf and sometimes words slur together and my brain interprets some crazy things. This is not my fault.)

Me: "An elephino! That's it!"

Nubs: "HA HA HA! No, a 'hell if I know'!!"

Me: "Oh."

Nubs: "Elephino?! That's great! You are such a dork!"

We continued to laugh about this for a good 30 miles. It was great stuff. In fact, it continued to be funny as we started to make our way back over the mountain pass. It was hilarious until we heard a loud BANG! from the rear of the car. Yeah, you guessed it folks, flat tire.

Since we are both decently intelligent human beings, this should not have been such a big deal. But I did mention this was CPB's car, right? And so after we dug around the mounds of crap she had stuffed in her tiny little trunk to find the spare tire and other paraphernalia needed to change the tire, we were already a little more than annoyed. Also, I mentioned that we were in comfies and flip-flops, right? And there is SNOW on the side of the road. Fun times.

After laying some clothes out so he wasn't sprawled on the icy ground, Nubs commenced attempting to change the tire. Guess what folks?? The lug wrench doesn't fit. Yup. And we're stranded. His phone's battery is dying with every minute that passes and my piece of crap phone lost signal before the elephino incident.

So after fighting with the tire until his toes are blue, Nubs decides we should try to move the car a little ways up the road and look for help. We stop once in what appears to be a driveway. Nubs braves the ankle deep snow and hikes a ways up the slight incline looking for lights on. He returns without luck and we chug along in the decrepit car another mile or two until we see what looks like a campground/RV place. There are lights on but sadly there is no one home. Good news though, there is an electrical outlet so Nubs can charge his phone. He promptly plugs it in and calls CPB to relate the problem.

Now, to save some space, I shall paraphrase the next few hours. (That's right, I said HOURS.) Basically she says that not only did she know that her lug wrench didn't work for her car but that the tire that had popped had recently been patched and she knew it could probably pop at anytime. Also, that since this trip was for Nubs and I, one of us needed to call a tow company and figure out how to pay for it. We basically told her to shove it.

So, with minimal funds, minimal fuel and no way to fix the flat, we told CPB to figure out the problem and get back to us. We huddled under our meager sweatshirts and munched on our snacks. Five long hours later, B arrives with a mechanic friend to attempt to help us change the tire. After working on the tire for nearly an hour and almost giving up more than once, the tire miraculously comes loose and is quickly changed. We give hugs and heartfelt thanks to our rescuers and pile back into the car to trudge the few more hours home.

The rest of our trip was spent in alternate fits of rage at the stupidity of CPB. Also, B had mentioned that while they had been working on a solution to our problem, CPB had been more worried about what Nubs and I must have been doing while stuck in the car on the side of a mountain. Needless to say, I was a bit pissed.

We made it back to town in one piece...and nearly exactly 24 hours after we had departed. We were tired, hungry, irritated and pretty much miserable. And yet...that car trip is still one of my favorite memories.

Nubs very shortly there after recognized his error and promptly broke up with CPB. The boyfriend was grateful to have me back safe and sound. Nubs and I agreed that we should probably avoid being in a car together for a while. And over all we learned one very valuable lesson: two very sleep deprived, cold and miserable people combined with copious amounts of sugar equals hilarity. Because, through it all, we never stopped laughing.

Oh...and since you're probably wondering where Nubs got his fascinating name...it was also from our desperation. At one point, (somewhere around the wee, wee hours of the early morning...) Nubs laughingly suggested that we could walk back to town. Approximately a 130 mile trip...in our flip-flops. We joked that by the time we made it to town, our legs would be nothing but nubs and stubs. And in our sugar induced state, the nickname was hilarious and stuck. A year later and I still call him Nubs...and he calls me Elephino.

The moral of this story, kids?

There are many ways in life of discovering who your soul mates are. I found one of mine during a 24 hour road trip that involved cold feet and minimal sleep, Korn and Tim McGraw, Red Vines and Mountain Dew. And if I learned nothing else from that trip, I learned that Nubs and I will be friends until the end of days. I also learned that there was once a prehistoric animal that was a crossbreed between an elephant and a rhinoceros. It was an elephino and it was grotesquely beautiful.

The End!

Toodles my loves!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

On the road with Nubs and Stubs



Ugh...I hate it. The feeling that you need to write, you want to write, you're sitting in front of the computer ready to write. Instead you stare at the blank screen waiting for inspiration to strike you.


And since it hasn't gone away with time, this "block", I've decided there are only two options. I can keep sitting here in all my blankness, screaming along to Led Zepplin, praying for a spark. Or...OR...I can tell you all a story. Yeah, we're going with option #2.

Once upon a time...

When I decided to throw caution to the wind and make some huge changes in my life last year, I met some amazing people. And, as is usually the case, some not so amazing people. I often wonder if one of the other reasons Nubs and I became such great friends so quickly was because we were both making some HUGE changes in our lives at the same time.

So last fall, while Nubs and I were both in the process of moving, we were brief roommates. That's to say, his girlfriend at the time (Let's call her CPB-as in "crazy-psycho-bitch"...you'll understand why later.) was rooming with B (NOT Miss B) and I was also crashing there for a few weeks. Add Nubs and we had a regular party.

Sometime around Halloween a road trip become necessary. Nubs needed to travel about three hours in one direction to take care of some business and I needed to travel about six hours in a different (not opposite, just not exactly the same...) direction to also conclude some business. Now while his trip was pretty mandatory, mine wasn't exactly life or death.

This would probably be a good time to tell you that CPB (as well as the boyfriend) had been working during the day so Nubs and I had had quite a bit of time to talk and become friends. I would like to make it perfectly clear that that's ALL it was. Apparently CPB was starting to become insanely jealous of this fact, though, and had concluded that Nubs and I must be having some sort of sordid affair. Pretty sick to think about when you remember that I consider this man like a brother, right?

The night before this road trip is supposed to take place, CPB does a complete 180 and says that Nubs is borrowing her car for the trip and I should go with him, i.e. killing two birds with one stone. Imagine our surprise since she had just the day before told Nubs that she was convinced he had some sort of secret relationship with me. (Clearly she didn't know me that well...or she would've known that I can't keep a secret at all.)

And so, it would happen that on a bright and early Wednesday morning Nubs and I bid adieu to our significant others and drove out to the coast. When we left town (in the northern part of Oregon) it was partly sunny and mostly clear. We were dressed in comfies and flip-flops and excited.

I don't care who you are, the possibility of a road trip is exciting.

And now that I'm looking at this all laid out, this story is quite long. In an effort to take a breather and make sure all of my details are accurate, I shall take a break here. Also, leaving you hanging is sure to bring you all back for the next chapter, is it not? Genius!!

I hope you all are having a great week and kicking December off with a bang. Can you really believe that in just a brief 30 days, 2010 will be nearly behind us? Are you sad or happy about this?

Until Part Deux, Toodles!!