Is it just me or does this year seem to just be flying by? It's already almost the end of June. And even on the smaller scale, it's already Friday again. It feels like it was only yesterday that I was doing my last weekend update for you. I guess in any case, it really is Friday and that would indeed mean that it's once again time for your Top 9 list. But first, a quick note. I have a notebook that I've been making notes in for upcoming lists. Sad as though it might be, I have been running a bit short on ideas as of late. Any suggestions or thoughts from my readers would be greatly appreciated. What would you like to see me make a list about? Leave it in the comments or email me at RandomMeows@gmail.com and let me know. I promise to give all of your ideas due consideration :)
And now, before I start rambling again, here's your list for this weekend:
Top 9 Celebrities or Public Figures I Love to Hate
~Paris Hilton
"That's hot." Ugh. Someone should just do the world a favor and put her out of our misery. There's just something about the spoiled little rich girls that irritate me from the start. Add to that the assumption that with orange skin, bleached hair and anorexia or bulimia that you're "hot" and I just wanna puke right there. (Ha ha ha...no pun intended, really...) However there is that weird fascination. You know what I mean, that kind of fascination that coined the phrase "It's like a train wreck...you know it's wrong but you still can't look away." Yup...she's exactly like a train wreck, and yet we can't look away.
~Dolly Parton
I grew up with country music and Miss Parton was definitely a staple. There's a few of her songs that I do actually like but for the most part, I roll my eyes at the thought of her. And the plastic surgery didn't help, in my opinion. Seriously...if you're gonna go under the knife, how about reducing the girls a bit, hmm? Instead of getting a tummy tuck so that they're even more pronounced by her pencil thin waist. Her chest has got to have its own zip code at this point. And it's only made worse by the plastic face and drawn on lips. Does anyone else see the resemblance to the plastic people in Soundgarden's Black Hole Sun video? Just curious.
~Oprah (Winfrey, that is...as if it could be anyone else)
The woman doesn't even need a last name. Which is probably for the better since she's been stringing the same guy along for years without having the decency to marry him. Her vast empire is enough to make Katie Couric envious. What I can't stand about her is that she preaches good will while sitting in her gilded palace. If you want the world to be a better place, how about you start spreading the wealth?
~Dr. Phil
If the man is a doctor, I'm the next Queen of England. (Just in case, you all should probably start practicing your curtsies...) The man is a QUACK. His brand of psycho-babble is quite possibly the worst thing on day-time television. The only reason anyone even knows of him is because Oprah gave him her blessing, his own show and propelled him into idiotic stardom. Which just adds to why I can't stand Oprah. See how nicely that worked out for me?
~Lindsay Lohan
Really folks? This one should be self explanatory...especially after Paris Hilton. And she used to be such an adorable little girl. Such a pity. I blame her parents. I don't care if my son becomes famous and makes millions...I will still blister his ass if he tries to pull half of the shit that Lilo has been up to. Instead, her money hungry parents indulged her whims and allowed her to spin out of control. Good job! I'm sure they couldn't have done better if they'd had parenting tips from the Spears' themselves.
~Octo-Mom (Nadya Denise Doud-Suleman)
Ugh. What is the fascination with all of this bad plastic surgery?? STAY AWAY FROM THE KNIFE! And really? She should just stay away from the damn doctors completely. There is absolutely no reason what so ever to have 14 children. Especially when you're a single mother mooching off of public assistance. Especially not when you're having said children with the hopes of gaining some media attention and using those children to barter for even more hand-outs. People like her should be stripped of their rights to have children and forced to have their tubes tied. What happens to those kids when the hoopla dies down and she gets tired of taking care of all of them?
~Simon Cowell
It's almost not fair that Simon's on the list since I don't even watch American Idol. But he's one of those train wrecks. As much as you don't want to pay any attention, you still don't change the channel when his name is mentioned on the news. Also, his attitude just bugs me...is it necessary to always be such an arrogant ass? I can be bitchy with the best of them...but I'm also nice from time to time. (At least, I like to think I am...hmmm....) Although, I will say, I have to appreciate his brand of honesty, even if it is a bit blunt at times. Some one's gotta be the one to not blow smoke up these peoples' butts.
~Jon and Kate...plus 8
I actually watched their show once upon a time. Kate's extreme O.C.D.-ness made me feel not so bad about my own. However, when I started seeing the extras they were getting, well I became quite disgusted. Kate gets a free tummy tuck and complete makeover. Jon gets hair transplants. They get a bigger house. The trips to Disneyworld and God only knows where else. Are you kidding me?? How about we stop exploiting our children for five damn minutes?!?! (Isn't it illegal, anyway?)
~The Duggars
There is no conceivable reason why someone should have 20 children. None what so ever. It is completely unnecessary. Granted, until they sold out and took their story to TLC, they were taking care of their family themselves and that does elevate them above the Gosselins and Octo-mom but still. The world is over-populated, isn't it? Who was the one who thought having 20 kids was a good idea? And I don't care how you look at it...it is NOT okay to be having a baby at the same time as your daughter-in-law. That's just creepy and smacks of trashy younger wives of men in mid-life crises wanting to be pregnant together with their step-daughters. Ew Ew Ew. Okay...I'm done, I think. Ew.
There it is, this week's Top 9 List. Since I'm so obviously a very judgemental person (Took you all awhile to pick up on that, didn't it?) I imagine there will be a few more lists along these lines somewhere in the future. And please, please, please people...remember to drop your suggestions or ideas for other Top 9 lists in the comments. Or, as always, you can email me at RandomMeows@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from you all! And on that note, I'm off to start the rock star girlfriend transformation process. Everyone have a safe and fantastic weekend! I'll be back on Monday with (hopefully) some funny stories to share with you :)
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