A letter to my son.

I know it's hard to believe, but I was once sitting where you are now. I had parents that thought they could teach me how to make good choices by telling me about the consequences of all of their bad decisions. I didn't listen then and I don't much expect you to listen now.

It's not your fault, it's human nature. Or maybe more importantly, how we've been raised. From the very first time you rolled from your back to your tummy, we've been praising you for making your own decisions, thinking for yourself and learning from your mistakes. Your first tentative steps followed shortly by a hard fall on your (diaper padded) bottom were a mere glance at what life would have in store for you. And oh how we loved watching you learn.

But now you're at the precipice of puberty and we adults are panicking. Big time.

Instead of remembering how we longed to stand on our own feet at your age, we remember what kids your age are like. And we want to save you, shelter you, protect you. It's our nature, as your parents. We want to save you from any pain.

I don't expect you to believe that I was the child that I want you to be. I lied to my parents, I snuck around and skipped school. I tried alcohol and cigarettes way too young and I got myself into and out of some pretty close scrapes.

I know, from my own childhood, that I can't expect you to learn from my mistakes. And I won't tell you that I regret any decision because I don't. Each one of those choices led me to here. They gave me you, love and taught me about the kind of person I want to be. I can only hope that by sharing, maybe you'll have more information when your turn to make these choices arises.

You are going to have crushes. You're going to "date" and you're going to break hearts...and yes, you'll have your heart broken. You're going to care about someone and you're going to get hurt. It may feel like your life is over, but it will really just be beginning. There will be pressure to go faster than you might be comfortable with, to move more quickly than you really want to. And it's going to take immense personal strength to stand up to that pressure.

You will be bullied. When the time comes and you're the one doing the bullying, remember how it felt when you were in their shoes.

You will have many "best" friends. When a friendship goes sour, try to leave it on the best terms possible and with your dignity intact. God knows I know how hard it will be, but always, ALWAYS try to be the better person. You will be glad you did.

Take pride in yourself and the values that you hold dear but be willing to accept that you won't always be right. Open yourself to learning new things and revising what you've been taught. There isn't always a set right answer. Find what you hold true and stand up for what you believe in.

There will be girls that say they love you and you will tell girls that you love them. To poorly quote Michael Jackson, "Don't go around breaking young girls' hearts." Things won't always work out but remember to treat them as ladies and hold yourself to be a gentleman.

There are consequences to each and every action, some good, some bad and some may not surface immediately. I can't tell you what choices to make, but please weigh the outcomes beforehand. Even just taking one minute of thought can save you a lifetime of hurt.

It is true what they say, as much as is possible, treat people how you want to be treated. Put all the good karma you can into the world and you shall be handsomely rewarded.

I know it won't always be popular to make the "right" decision, but please remember that popularity can and will fade and when it does, your virtue will be all that you can hold on to.

I can promise you two things will always be true.

1) I will always love you. I may not always like what you do or say, but at the end of the day, you are still my son and part of my heart. I can not hate you.

2) You can always talk to me about anything. I can't promise I won't freak out, I can't promise that I will always want to hear what you have to tell me. But because I love you, I will listen and I will offer help if you ask for it.

I'm a firm believer that once the lines of communication have been damaged, there is little to be done to repair them. I promise to not shut you out. All I ask is that you don't shut me out.

You will get warnings, people will tell you all of the horrible consequences for many of the decisions you will find yourself faced with...and you will tell yourself that they won't happen to you. Please remember, they can ALWAYS happen to ANYONE. Protect yourself and be smart. Naivety and ignorance will only bring you pain.

I love you son, and how I wish I could live this life for you so that you will never hurt, never fail. I will try my hardest to not shelter you too much and to give you the freedom to learn your own lessons instead of trying to teach you from mine.

Most importantly, don't forget to smile, laugh and LIVE. You are only young with minimal cares for this short period of time. Enjoy every last second, I can promise you, you will be glad you did.